Joy in the Journey.

Seven years ago, the unknown was placed before me. I anxiously and excitedly packed my things for college and headed to Rexburg, Idaho. All I knew was college was for me. It screamed adventure, hot single men and independence (and independence means the world to me).

I was so brave.

Or so I thought.

I checked into my first college apartment and began to unpack my things. One by one, I began to meet my roommates. And one by one, that fearlessness of mine began to turn and run the other direction. Finally when I met the fifth and last roommate, I lost it. That courage of mine withered away and I was convinced this college scene was not for me after all. I cried hysterically to my mom and begged her to let me go home with her. That experience allowed me to quickly realize that life never goes the way you think it will. And since then, I have learned just that. 

These past seven years (more like past two), have taught me to "Never Say Never" because every time I say, "I will never do that" given time, I usually find myself doing exactly what I said I wouldn't. 

Examples?

"I will NEVER not use my college degree"

I worked at Nordstrom for almost 3 years before teaching.

"I will NEVER live in Provo, Utah"

Guess where I live? Two Years strong and I still love it. 

"I will NEVER marry a Utah boy."

So far, some of them have been the most appealing. 

Catch my drift?

So this has led me to wonder: have I been finding joy in this journey that has had a way different course than I could ever expect? In moments of stress and disappointment, am I dwelling on the negative or finding the positive? 

I wish I could say 100% without doubt, that I focus on the positive. But I can't. Right now, I'm focusing on all the things I can't change, rather than focusing on the things I CAN control and the things that DO make me happy. Right now, I am choosing to dwell on perfection rather than progression. I let the silliest things stress me out. 

Starting Monday (because that is the only day possible to start anything) I am going to be that courageous 18 year old girl who was ready to grab life by the horns. I am going to be that person I know I can be. I am going to focus on the things I can control and let go of the things I can't. I am not going to stress over the silly, insignificant things. I am going to laugh more. Compliment more. Listen more. Because progression in the little things is more important than perfection in all things. 

YOLO.